I'm in a hurry up and wait pattern I think. Frustrated and trying to remain optimistic.
First off. I have no symptoms at all. No m/s or enhanced sense of smell etc. And at last test, my hcg is high enough that if its going to happen it should. I know most women would be grateful to have a symptom free pregnancy, but for those of us who are fertility challenged, symptoms are the only ways we can tell we're still pregnant.
Okay, so I have one slight 'advantage'. Because my progesterone levels don't seem to be high enough and we're playing with meds, I get extra blood tests and since they are sucking my blood, I'm asking for more hcg tests at the same time. Mondays hcg was 3804. A little slower rise than between tests 1 and 2 but still more than doubling in 48 hours. Most recent blood draw was this morning. Now I just need to wait (not so patiently) for my Dr to get the results.
Oh, I saw the Dr on Tuesday. Nothing exciting. We chatted, wrote up some more prescriptions and booked the ultrasound. No weight, no bp, no check-up, no nothing else. Just a regular appointment with my Dr. She did say she hoped I was on major sedatives when they were yanking the adhesions from my cervix and cringed when I said that I had nothing at all, and yes it did hurt.
The U/S is not going to be until Nov 15. The 11th would have been the earliest to see the heartbeat. The 15th is the first appointment after that. I hear that many women with fertility issues are scared that they'll see nothing in the u/s. I'm one of them. Terrified even.
Why does having babies come so easy to some and so hard to others? Why can the heroin addict down the street give birth to a drug addicted baby every year and I can't even have one? How can so many teenagers get pregnant the 'only time' they've ever had sex? Why do people who don't want children, those who abuse children, get to have them, no tests, no questions asked, but we have to go through psych evals, invasive tests and home assessments? Certainly not fair when you look at it.
Anyway, sorry to go off on a rant. I'm just trying to pass time until my next results come in.
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Friday, October 24, 2008
4w3d
So far so good. My second beta came in at 712. This is almost 3x the first value, which only needed to double so I’m feeling better now.
My progesterone is just on the border of being low, so I have to up that one. I test it again on Monday to see if it’s improved. Since they are sucking my blood out anyway, I’m getting another hcg done, just for fun.
I see the Dr on Tuesday for my first ever prenatal exam. Any suggestions of questions to ask? I’m going to bring a list because I know I’ll forget some in the excitement.
The picture is of the embryos before being sucked into the catheter, then let lose in me. Cute aren’t they? Click on the image to see all three.
Does anyone want to play the guess how many babies are growing? Consensus seems to be “at least 2”. I won’t know for a few more weeks and the ultrasound, but it’s pointing towards twins so I’ll be wrapping my head around that.
I think, in many ways, twins with DE & DS is not a bad thing. It means that they would each have a full blood relative. Sometimes that helps with the questions that could come up. Ideally, if twins, I’d love to have a girl and a boy. In reality, I just want healthy babies, no matter the gender or count.
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
8dp5dt
A picture is worth a thousand words, or in this case a picture is worth 265 hcg. Taken this morning, a couple of hours before going in for my blood hcg that came back this afternoon at 265.
So yes, dear blog readers it looks like I might have done it this time. I’m sorry for being a bit vague a couple of days ago when I posted about testing early. The test actually showed a faint line. I nearly fainted. Since I had never seen a line before I was stunned. I have never seen a line in either a hpt or opk. I’ve held them to light and looked at them under microscopes but no line. Until this time. And while it was faint, it was there. The camera did not capture it well, but trust me, there is a line. (Follow the links to see the older pee sticks) http://members.shaw.ca/homedoll/5dp5dt.jpg
Because I was still in disbelief, but wanting to save my other FR test for the next morning, I went to the Tesco and bought a cheap-o test (under $3), hoping I could figure out enough of the Czech to know what to do (what’s there to do, pee on a stick and check for lines). It was another faint line, but it was also mid-afternoon 5dp5dt.
The next day, the line was still faint, but definitely darker. I felt a bit elated heading home on the plane. But of course, worried and concerned. http://members.shaw.ca/homedoll/6dp5dt.jpg
So then, 1 week after the transfer, I got a line dark enough to start to feel a bit confident. Actually, I did two. In part because I wanted to try a different brand, and in part because I originally woke up at 1:30 (jet lag and pee need) and then another at a normal wake-up time of 6am
http://members.shaw.ca/homedoll/7dp5dt_1.jpg
http://members.shaw.ca/homedoll/7dp5dt_2.jpg
After some board encouragement, I decided not to wait until the 14 days after transfer for my beta, besides I was getting very nervous and wanted confirmation. So, I took another test around dinner time (I told you I was addicted) and the line was as dark as a dark line can be. No need for a picture. It looked a lot like the one in the morning.
This morning, before going to the lab for blood work, I pulled out the CB Digital. I had been saving this one, hoping to have used it last cycle, hoping to be able to use it before it expired in 2009. I peed. It said results normally within 3 minutes. Less than 60 seconds later, it said “pregnant”/”Enceinte”. (hmmm too bad I couldn't find one with the Czech word for pregnant)
So then I spent the rest of the day, waiting for the doctor to call. Trying to focus on work. Eventually, I moved into a meeting room so I could call the Dr in private. They couldn’t find the results, so I had to wait while they called the lab. But it was so worth the wait.
So what next? Beta 2 is going to be on Thursday. For the few out there not immersed in TTC terminology, a beta value should double in 48-72 hours. So for me this means that on Thursday, my number should be no less than 425, hopefully more than 530. My progesterone and estrogen levels will also be checked. Since this was a donor cycle, my hormones were blocked and are now be artificially maintained.
Then I’ll see my Dr early next week for my first prenatal exam. We’ll probably do another beta after that, just to see (more on why in a bit).
Then likely nothing until week 7 (after Nov 11) when I can go for an U/S that would show the heartbeat and count the number of growing fetus’. Yes, count the number. While there could be only one, the beta value I have now is quite high for a singleton. From a beta database, the average hcg for a singleton where I am, which is the equivalent of 13dpo is 68. Mine is just a teeny-tiny bit higher. For twins the average is 120 and for…gulp….triplets+ it’s 184. I have 265. Now that is just an average and there are upper end values near mine in singletons (not many, but some).
I’m happy, stunned and shocked. No matter how many little ones are growing in me, I want a safe pregnancy and I want them to be born healthy. That’s a long way away. Right now, I’m 4w0d. If there is just one, the estimated due date is July 1st/June 30th. If there are multiples, then it would be earlier (probably by June 10). I read somewhere once that more twins were born under the sign of Gemini, than any other astrological sign. I’m a Gemini – we are very compatible with other Gemini.
Twins. Oh God. So I’m on a serious budget now. I was going to have to some major budgeting with one, but with the chance of more than one, I’m looking at possible bed rest and an early delivery, not to mention a few more expenses early on and double the day care when I go back to work and eventually moving to a bigger place. So, no discretionary income anymore. I have a few things I’ve committed to in the next couple of months that I’ll follow through, but that is it. Nothing more. And I have to downsize the clutter. Big time down sizing.
For those who know me IRL, this information is still totally confidential. I don’t know when I’ll tell ‘people’. The rate of MC right now is very high. It goes down a bit after seeing the heartbeats, but most people put a marker in after the first trimester, after week 13. Depending on which calculator I use, this is Dec 13 or Dec 26 or Jan 4. I think I’d like to tell people at Christmas. Then again, I may just blurt it out before that.
Okay, enough verbiage. Time to go home and walk dogs.
Another reminder to those IRL, if you call me during the day, I am at work. Other people can hear what I say. I am not going to talk about this over the phone if I’m at work. Enough said.
So yes, dear blog readers it looks like I might have done it this time. I’m sorry for being a bit vague a couple of days ago when I posted about testing early. The test actually showed a faint line. I nearly fainted. Since I had never seen a line before I was stunned. I have never seen a line in either a hpt or opk. I’ve held them to light and looked at them under microscopes but no line. Until this time. And while it was faint, it was there. The camera did not capture it well, but trust me, there is a line. (Follow the links to see the older pee sticks) http://members.shaw.ca/homedoll/5dp5dt.jpg
Because I was still in disbelief, but wanting to save my other FR test for the next morning, I went to the Tesco and bought a cheap-o test (under $3), hoping I could figure out enough of the Czech to know what to do (what’s there to do, pee on a stick and check for lines). It was another faint line, but it was also mid-afternoon 5dp5dt.
The next day, the line was still faint, but definitely darker. I felt a bit elated heading home on the plane. But of course, worried and concerned. http://members.shaw.ca/homedoll/6dp5dt.jpg
So then, 1 week after the transfer, I got a line dark enough to start to feel a bit confident. Actually, I did two. In part because I wanted to try a different brand, and in part because I originally woke up at 1:30 (jet lag and pee need) and then another at a normal wake-up time of 6am
http://members.shaw.ca/homedoll/7dp5dt_1.jpg
http://members.shaw.ca/homedoll/7dp5dt_2.jpg
After some board encouragement, I decided not to wait until the 14 days after transfer for my beta, besides I was getting very nervous and wanted confirmation. So, I took another test around dinner time (I told you I was addicted) and the line was as dark as a dark line can be. No need for a picture. It looked a lot like the one in the morning.
This morning, before going to the lab for blood work, I pulled out the CB Digital. I had been saving this one, hoping to have used it last cycle, hoping to be able to use it before it expired in 2009. I peed. It said results normally within 3 minutes. Less than 60 seconds later, it said “pregnant”/”Enceinte”. (hmmm too bad I couldn't find one with the Czech word for pregnant)
So then I spent the rest of the day, waiting for the doctor to call. Trying to focus on work. Eventually, I moved into a meeting room so I could call the Dr in private. They couldn’t find the results, so I had to wait while they called the lab. But it was so worth the wait.
So what next? Beta 2 is going to be on Thursday. For the few out there not immersed in TTC terminology, a beta value should double in 48-72 hours. So for me this means that on Thursday, my number should be no less than 425, hopefully more than 530. My progesterone and estrogen levels will also be checked. Since this was a donor cycle, my hormones were blocked and are now be artificially maintained.
Then I’ll see my Dr early next week for my first prenatal exam. We’ll probably do another beta after that, just to see (more on why in a bit).
Then likely nothing until week 7 (after Nov 11) when I can go for an U/S that would show the heartbeat and count the number of growing fetus’. Yes, count the number. While there could be only one, the beta value I have now is quite high for a singleton. From a beta database, the average hcg for a singleton where I am, which is the equivalent of 13dpo is 68. Mine is just a teeny-tiny bit higher. For twins the average is 120 and for…gulp….triplets+ it’s 184. I have 265. Now that is just an average and there are upper end values near mine in singletons (not many, but some).
I’m happy, stunned and shocked. No matter how many little ones are growing in me, I want a safe pregnancy and I want them to be born healthy. That’s a long way away. Right now, I’m 4w0d. If there is just one, the estimated due date is July 1st/June 30th. If there are multiples, then it would be earlier (probably by June 10). I read somewhere once that more twins were born under the sign of Gemini, than any other astrological sign. I’m a Gemini – we are very compatible with other Gemini.
Twins. Oh God. So I’m on a serious budget now. I was going to have to some major budgeting with one, but with the chance of more than one, I’m looking at possible bed rest and an early delivery, not to mention a few more expenses early on and double the day care when I go back to work and eventually moving to a bigger place. So, no discretionary income anymore. I have a few things I’ve committed to in the next couple of months that I’ll follow through, but that is it. Nothing more. And I have to downsize the clutter. Big time down sizing.
For those who know me IRL, this information is still totally confidential. I don’t know when I’ll tell ‘people’. The rate of MC right now is very high. It goes down a bit after seeing the heartbeats, but most people put a marker in after the first trimester, after week 13. Depending on which calculator I use, this is Dec 13 or Dec 26 or Jan 4. I think I’d like to tell people at Christmas. Then again, I may just blurt it out before that.
Okay, enough verbiage. Time to go home and walk dogs.
Another reminder to those IRL, if you call me during the day, I am at work. Other people can hear what I say. I am not going to talk about this over the phone if I’m at work. Enough said.
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