fly-by post 5dp5dt

It's my last night in Prague and I have a few more things to see before I leave tomorrow morning. I've had a great time and while I wish I had more time, I will be glad to be home. I will admit that this was has been a great way to pass one of the weeks in the two week wait.
I promise I'll do a full travel blog one day when I'm back. It should get me through another night of the 2WW.
Yes it is early, it's is very early to be testing or even thinking about it. The tests are notoriously unreliable this early. But what can I say, I'm an addict. I think there should be a 12 step support group. "Hi, my name is Selmada and I pee on sticks" So, knowing it was too early, I POAS today. Oh well. There is always tomorrow.
Thanks for the great words of support.

Good so far

This will be a short one. I am at an internet cafe and want to go to the zoo later.

8 eggs were fertilized. This is one more than last time, but we will see how many make it to transfer. I wont transfer less than I did last time, which was 3. My lining was a whopping 18mm and the progesterone will make it even thicker. Speaking of the progesterone, the new doctor changed the protocol slightly to just using utrogaston, but more of it. Progesterone puts me to sleep. I am taking a couple of extra naps each day. I cant help it. I only hope I dont fall asleep at the zoo.

The pension is still great. I got a room with a kitchen this time, so along with a fridge and kettle, I have a microwave and hotplate. So unlike last time, its not all fried cheese for food. Also, there are now 2 english movie channels and a couple of music video channels. There is only one other couple there though and I really miss the commeraderie of the group from the summer.

Oh well. I am off for now. Transfer is Monday. I am not sure if I will post again before that. We will see.

Weather is great. I will go enjoz it.

I'm leaving, on a jet plane

Tickets - check
Meds - check
Passport - check
Book - check
Phrase book - Czech
Sanity - not so sure

In a couple of hours I leave for the Czech Republic, via Amsterdam. To say I have reached panic state would be an understatement. To most people, I look calm, sane and collected, but inside I'm a total mess. I know I'll calm down a bit once I have the first appointment on Wednesday and get the fert report. But now, not so calm.
The service I go through for translation, clinic bookings etc, somehow mixed up the dates for when I need to get picked up in Prague. They were waiting for me at the airport today. Yikes. I checked and I had written confirmation for the 7th. Then, when checking last night for my flight status, the same flight I'm taking today, was delayed 3 hours yesterday! I don't have 3 hours between flights. Please be on time today. Please, please be on time.
The bus to the airport used to come to a couple of hotels nearby (2-3 blocks). But that route got cancelled. Now I have to take the city buys downtown so I can catch the airport bus. Or pay a small mint and take a cab. I could do city bus the whole way, but it involves 3 buses and I have transferring and I have luggage to lug.
I worked out a 'schedule' of how to concert my meds over while travelling and still keeping the 'take in the morning', 'take on an empty stomach','take with food','take 4 hours before any vitamins' rules without doubling up too soon or missing a dose of something. I'll have to do the reverse on the way back.
Dogs have figured out something is up. I cant even shift my position while sitting without them coming running (well, they are sleeping next to me, so they don't have far to run). They are the other reason for stress. I have a great friend K, who will be staying to take care of them and the cat while I'm gone. I know they will get great care, but that doesn't stop me from stressing about it. The fur kids are the only kids I have right now.
Okay, must go finish the few last minute things and keep busy so I don't stress.
Watch this spot for updates. I'm not taking my laptop to save on weight of luggage on the way back. Puts me dependent on Internet cafes so not sure how frequent the updates will be.

Thick, thick

Today was my lining check before I head to CZ.

For those who don't know me IRL, I have a teeny, tiny bladder. I also seem to process fluids very quickly. I usually cant make it through a movie and definitely not through the night.

I don't know how it works elsewhere, but even though I only needed the lining check, the clinic has to do a full check. I've learnt (the hard way) that even thought the U/S clinic wants me to drink 2 litres of water 2 hours before my appointment, that is not going to work for me. So today, I made a last minute trip to the bathroom an hour before my appointment. I had a modest 1 litre of water in the cab on the way over. I was so full, I really hoped they weren't running behind. I was in luck and they actually took me in earlier.

I was already overfull on my bladder so she gave me the cup and let me practice that joy of only letting a 'little' out. Grr. I made it through the abdominal check and had to empty out for my date with the dildo-cam. Ever so joyful. She had to hurry that part up too, because, surprise, surprise, my bladder was already filling up again and making it hard to read. Luckily I made it through and while I wiped the goop off and out of me, she passed the scans onto the doctor..

The Doctor dictated the results and faxed them to my Dr (they cant give them to me directly). She was off today, but her receptionist called me because she figured I'd know which part of the report was needed. I'm happy to say I outdid myself. My lining, with 10 days until transfer is 12mm and the report said 'very nicely triple striped'. 12!!! Last time, at this point it was 9.5, also a good figure, up to almost 14 at transfer. I'm a bit concerned that it's going to be too thick, but I've heard back from CZ and its fine.

So, I think its safe to say at this point that growing a lining is not one of my issues. Now I just hope the embryos enjoy the comfy home.

I have 3 more sleeps before my flight (if I sleep). On Monday, its a 12.5 hour trip (including one short transfer) to Prague (where it will be Tuesday aft). This is followed by a 3-4 hour drive to Zlin. I'll see the Dr on Wed, get another lining check and find out how many eggs were retrieved. I also start progesterone. Then I get to play tourist until a 5 day transfer on Monday. I'll get 1-2 reports on how the embies are growing in between so I should have a good idea of what to expect on the 13th.

I requested the 13th for the transfer in part because its a holiday and it required one less vacation day, but also because its Thanksgiving (Canadian) and I really want something to give thanks for. For those in Canada, celebrating Turkeyday this year, before dinner, give a little thought my way please.


I made it to the early polls today to vote, so that is one more thing off my list.

Organized (or not)

I'm starting to get a tiny bit organized. I've bought most of what I wanted and now just need to sort the clothes out that I want to pack and make sure they are all clean.
Today I picked up the one thing I really wanted to bring - socks with those little grippy things on the bottom. At the CZ clinic, they like you to spend at least an hour after transfer with NO movement. So the transfer takes place in the recovery bed. They angle the foot of it into an inverted V, then have you scoot your butt to the end, with your feet perched there. No stirrups. After the transfer, they move you back a bit and wheel the bed into recovery for an hour.
Last time, my leg started to shake and I had to grab my socks to hold on. I dont think it would be a 'good' tranfer if I kicked the doctor in the head. Of course, last time, he had a hard time finding my cervix and I had to move to the big gyno bed-thingy. It seemed awkward, but it kept my legs still. But then I had to move beds after. I'm hoping not to move this time and of course, I'm hoping not to boot the doctor.
I also got some more of those bags that you roll your stuff up in to take up less space in the luggage. Oh, and while I was in the sock area, I picked up some of those socks that help when travelling.
One week, I leave in one week.
I'm trying to stay very positive. I wouldnt be doing this if I didnt think I could get pregnant. At the same time I need to not build it up so much because if I get another BFN, it will be even harder. How do I balance 'positive thinking' with realistic expectations??

To Do Lists

I'm -19db 5dt or in English - I'm 19 days before my 5 day transfer.

It's also 12 days until my flight to CZ. I'm not packed. This isn't too bad since lots of things can't be packed yet because I still need them before the trip. But I haven't even finished my packing list! Truth be told, I didn't fully unpack after my last attempt. At first it was because I couldn't lift much in the 2ww, then it was more the depression of the BFN and facing the suitcase meant facing that. I'm not even sure what is in my suitcase and carry on right now. I had a small panic moment a couple of weeks ago and verified that I did know where my passport (and I was right, it expires next year).

I have some shopping to do before I go. Nothing big but a couple of things here and there. I did manage to pick up some gloves today. I'm sure I have some packed away at home somewhere, but it will be a while before I need them here and it's one less thing to worry about now.

K, my dog and cat sitter, will need to put up with the more-than-usual-clutter. I had high hopes of going through clothes, papers, books and even organizing my kitchen cupboards before I went. Didn't happen. Won't happen. My normally boring social calendar was blocked full this month (I'm actually hoping for rain this weekend to get one or two things postponed).

One thing that I can't forget to do before I go or put off until I come back is to vote. Yes, dear readers, we in Canada are also having an election this fall. The official poll day is Oct 14, the day after my transfer. I plan to vote in one of the early polls before I leave. But I still have no idea who I'll be voting for.

For me, personally, who I vote for has always been a combination of how I feel about the specific candidate's ability to represent me (and my neighbors) and how I feel about the party s/he represents. In many things, the candidate will vote as s/he feels appropriate, for controversial things, they are required to vote along party lines, so both need to be taken into account. It's because of this that I don't think any candidate, after being elected can chose to change parties without a by-election. Party changing like that is not part of democracy as it doesn't represent the voters.

Not voting isn't an option. I'm appalled at the low voter turnout. I think the last federal election over 30% of eligible voters didn't vote. What the heck?!? I suspect that many of that 30% were the first to complain when Parliament did something they didn't like. I think if you don't vote, you can't complain. I also don't agree with people who don't vote for the person they want because they feel 'it will be throwing their vote away'. No vote, when made honestly is a throw away. Anyone who wins in a riding had better be aware that if they don't win more than 50% of the vote that they had better pay attention to why if they want to stay around. Plus, I think outcomes of elections could be very different if every single eligible voter voted honestly.

And speaking of honesty. Can I send a message out the leaders???? Please stop negative campaigning. Please stop fear mongering. Don't tell me how terrible life will be under the leadership of someone else. Explain to me how you will make it good. If you cannot stand on your own as a good leader without slamming someone else then why would anyone want to follow you???

All this to say I have one more thing to do before leaving for my DE trip. I need to learn more about the candidates (I know the party platforms) and I need to vote. I also urge all of you out there in reader land to vote.